Dr. Rob’s “One Pointed Attention”

I’ve recently been revising my book, Conversations With My Old Dog, which I wrote twenty years ago about the conversations I was having with my 14 year old Lab, Lucy. As Lucy was showing the ravages of aging, so was my 83 year-old father, Al. They both passed away in 1999, one month apart. Here is one of the latest revised entries about a problem that has only grown worse with the invention of the iPhone.

One Pointed Attention

Lucy,

I envy your one-pointed attention.

Never seeming to do two things at once,

how do you get everything done?

I learned long ago to do several things at once.

My parents taught me through example:

Dad could

sit at the dinner table,

eat,

read the newspaper, always the funnies first, and

carry on a conversation all at the same time.

Mom always listened to the radio and glanced at

the mirror, no matter what else she was doing.

I can’t help but

read while I eat,

read while I use the bathroom,

listen to the radio while I drive (and drink coffee),

glance at the newspaper when I talk to someone,

drink coffee as I do therapy.

Do you get distracted, too, Lucy?

Do you fantasize about your pal Remington while

playing ball?

Do you dream of bones lost and balls found while

you hold a sit-stay?

Do dogs worry about

death,

vision loss,

hearing loss,

incontinence,

cancer,

poverty?

Who is going to take care of you in old age?

Will you experience doctor-assisted suicide without

even asking for it?

Where are you going when you die?

Or are you always here in the present,

alert to the opportunity for

food,

the chance to go for a walk,

for someone to pet you?

Teach me one-pointed attention, Lucy;

I long to be here fully, too.

For me, being fully present is tough;

I may be in one place, but my mind is often somewhere else—

in the future,

in the past,

in daydreams

—just not here.